Jokes

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

one for the dentists, like @Iggy:

 

[Iggy]

vor 33 Minuten schrieb rwlturtle:

one for the dentists, like @Iggy:

...

 

Sorry, I originally did'nt mention that the posting I was answering is in the english forum - so I changed my answer from german to english.

 

O.K., again I have to disappoint you. 

Today we don't pull as many teeth as in former days - MUCH LESS.

Irrespective of that, according to my official statistics of my quarterly settlement, per 100 patients I only pull half as much teeth compared with the average of bavarian dentists. 

 

And now some learning for life:

On the other hand tooth extractions will increase again, 'cause things like "we'll try to keep the tooth for at least 2 or 3 years" nowadays are increasingly impossible due to liability issues.

The health insurances also call something like that "uneconomic".

So in the end the patient looses.

 

 

Greetings 

 

Iggy

 

Bearbeitet 23. Mai 2018 von Iggy

[rwlturtle]

You`re not funny, @Iggy.

 

 

Bearbeitet 23. Mai 2018 von rwlturtle
picture

[Computerfritze]

[rwlturtle]

[Balu der Bär]

 

[rwlturtle]

[A.P.]

The fact that there is a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about expected traffic numbers....

[Computerfritze]

 

Jesus lebt. 

 

Bearbeitet 27. Mai 2018 von Computerfritze

[rwlturtle]

Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women

#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road.

#8 - If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.

#7 - Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

#6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5 - A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4 - Guns function normally every day of the month.

#3 - A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2 - A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the Number One reason Why Men Prefer Guns over women.....

#1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun

[rwlturtle]

An old Pilot sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee.

As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him..

She turned to the pilot and asked, 'Are you a real pilot?'

He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life flying biplanes, Cubs, Aeronca's, Neiuports, flew in WWII in a B-29, and later in the Korean conflict, taught 50 people to fly and gave rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot.'

She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.'

The two sat sipping in silence.

A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked: "are you a real pilot?"

He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian.'

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[Domenicus]

A man visits a Chinese doctor: „Doc, i have a problem, everytime i pass gas, it sounds like cheap Japanese car revving“

Doc replies: „Is no big problem, only little abscess on your butt“

“Are you sure? How can you tell without looking at it at all?“

“ Is simple. Old Chinese saying is Abscess makes the fart go Honda“

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake...

He finds his way to the bar and orders a shot of whiskey.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, do you
wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell
that joke, cowboy, I think it's only fair that you should know five things
since you're blind."

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a Billy-Club
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman to your right is a blonde professional wrestler.
5. The person to my right is a blonde weight lifter.

"Now think seriously, cowboy... Do you still want to tell that blonde
joke?"

The cowboy sits and thinks for a second, then shakes his head.

"No, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times..."

[fa.454]