Jokes

[rwlturtle]

[Gast]

There was a comic book of Super Friends, introducing Zan and Jayna, the twins had a warning for the friends that some maniac had plant some bombs, each bomb has to be treated special. So they cooperate with local heroes.

A girl without any corps temperature, Jack o Lantern alongside Green Lantern, a japanese ThunderLord and Black Canary, a bearded man with some biblic items and Supie, a ginger with very special hair alongside Ralph Dibny, a three eyed hero with Tornado (they left the bomb in the past), an african hero called Impala and (red) Flash

and a greek hero with >guess who< 

 

But the only comic strip today is VISIER

[rwlturtle]

[A.P.]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[Shiva]

I don't like jokes about 9/11. They tend to crash and burn.

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[A.P.]

[rwlturtle]

[Gast]

Makes more sense than the german version for the Opel Omega I saw :D

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[rwlturtle]

[mwe]

[mwe]

A guy walks into a bar carrying a bag and orders a beer.
“Whatcha got in the bag?” The bartender asks as he pours the man a beer.
He reaches in to the bag, and to the bartenders utter amazement, the customer places a little man about a foot tall on the bar.
He then sets a tiny piano on the bar, and the little man sits down and starts playing.
“That is freakin amazing!” the bartender exclaims. “Where on earth did you discover him?”

 

Without replying, the man reaches back into his bag and retrieves a lamp, which he proceeds to rub.
Sure enough, out pops a genie.
“Holy shit!” The bartender says. “Is that a genie?”
“Yep” the customer replies.
“One like the stories, that can grant wishes?”
“Yep”
“So can I make a wish?”
“Sure.”

 

The bartender thinks for a second and says “I wish for a million bucks.”
With a puff of smoke, ducks start raining down inside the bar.
“I said bucks, not ducks. Is that damn genie hard of hearing or something?
The customer replied “Do you really think I wished for a 12-inch pianist?”

[mwe]

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck."
"Yep," replies the duck.
"And you can talk!" exclaims the barman.
"Yep again”, says the duck, "Now if you don't mind, can I please have my beer and my sandwich?"
"Certainly, sorry about that”, says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint. "It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road," explains the duck. "I'm a plasterer."

The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck, and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls a newspaper out from his bag and starts to read it. So the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves. The same thing happens for two weeks.

Then one day the circus comes to town. The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him, "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"

"Sounds marvelous," says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."

So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."
"I'm always looking for the next job," Says the duck. "Where is it?"
“At the circus," Says the barman.
"The circus?" Repeats the duck.
"That's right," replies the barman.
"The circus?" The duck asks again, “with the big tent?"
"Yeah," the barman replies.
"With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?" asks the duck.
"Of course," the barman replies.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.
"That's right!" says the barman.
The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says.... "I wonder what the fuck they want with a plasterer?"

[mwe]